Orlando, Florida was just another medium-sized citrus town before "you-know-
who-with-the-white-gloves" came along. Its status as a mecca for tourism has
plastered itself across a national and World-wide scale. The result is a city whose
visitors never really get to experience the actual city. Disney World, Universal and
Sea World all sit outside the city limits. Is there something to Orlando besides theme
parks? I'll put it this way: while I had no problem driving from nearby Tampa Bay to
hang out in the city proper, I wouldn't fly there to check out the "REAL" Orlando.
Still, it's a shame that so many people don't check out Winter Park with its beautiful
Spanish-style homes or Lake Lucerne or one of the many other lakes which makes
the mosquito the state bird of Florida.
who-with-the-white-gloves" came along. Its status as a mecca for tourism has
plastered itself across a national and World-wide scale. The result is a city whose
visitors never really get to experience the actual city. Disney World, Universal and
Sea World all sit outside the city limits. Is there something to Orlando besides theme
parks? I'll put it this way: while I had no problem driving from nearby Tampa Bay to
hang out in the city proper, I wouldn't fly there to check out the "REAL" Orlando.
Still, it's a shame that so many people don't check out Winter Park with its beautiful
Spanish-style homes or Lake Lucerne or one of the many other lakes which makes
the mosquito the state bird of Florida.
Tampa, Florida is appealing if you like constant traffic congestion, a vacant down-
town and nothing but modern buildings. I find it to be Florida's answer to Seattle: it
really has no soul. But it does have some nice scenery. Take a walk along Bayshore
Blvd. or go on Davis Island and get some amazing views of the water. This is do-able
if you don't get run down by idiots in Mercedes on Howard Avenue. Tampa is wealthy,
but Tampa is also full of pretense. Society drooled when Donald Trump wanted to
build one of his towers there. I guess the place considers itself the Miami of the Gulf
Coast. Hardly. The nightlife is mainly restricted to less-than-desirable "hoochie-
mamas" in less-than-full clothing, and the ever-present Hooters-esque waitress look-
a-likes (both 20 and 50-somethings). Ybor City's preservation is commendable, but I
only partied twice there, due to shady characters. As far as diversity goes, it definitely
exists in Tampa. Still, the city's Gay Pride celebration was diverted to nearby St.
Petersburg because there were too many haters in Tampa. The downtown, while
sometimes architecturally interesting, goes dark at 6pm. Stay off of the Howard
Frankland Bridge between 3 and 7pm. Stay off of I-275 in the downtown area
between 12am and 11:59pm.
Clearwater, Florida could use some help. Although the city's beach remains a hot
destination for Spring Breakers, the blight that visitors see on their way to the white
sands is as attractive as the numerous billboards on its main, dangerous and heavily
commercialized artery, US 19. Clearwater has made good use of its location, proven
by the fantastic Sand Key and Coachman Parks. The Church of Scientology has
rescued much of downtown Clearwater, as the city is the worldwide conference
headquarters for the cult--err--church. While they have built some beautiful structures,
you just can't help but feel that the rest of the city kinda blows. Poor zoning laws and
awful 60s building material have conspired to make this city far less appealing than the
beach five miles west of it.
St. Petersburg, Florida is my favorite city in Florida. Sure, my former residency there
might make me a little biased. But I also worked in Clearwater, and lived close enough
to Tampa to be able to say that St. Pete has its neighboring cities beat hands down in
terms of culture, beautification and traffic. First of all, St. Petersburg has some terrific
neighborhoods including Old Northeast, Mirror Lake, the Jungle and Snell Isle. Out
of the three largest Bay cities, St. Pete does the best job of preserving its beautiful
historic structures. Not only that, but brick-paved streets are common in many
neighborhoods and a few fabulous 1910s-era resorts have avoided the wrecking ball.
Scenic parks such as North Shore, Vinoy and the cozy Pass-A-Grille are part of St.
Pete's beauty. The traffic here is more manageable due to the city's grid structure.
More than anything, St. Pete has an abundance of excellent museums (the Salvador
Dali and Holocaust, to name a couple) theaters, galleries and unique restaurants,
which suggest to the visitor that the Gulf beaches shouldn't be the only plan on the
itinerary.
Sarasota, Florida is filthy rich. It begins a string of Gulf Coast cities that learned
from the epic zoning mistakes of nearby Tampa Bay and decided that the place
needed to stay as originally intended: a retreat for the old--not a playground for the
young. Still, its population of well-to-do retirees has benefited Sarasota culturally,
providing some very attractive galleries, new theaters and a better-than-it-deserves
massive library. But while Sarasota and the cities of Fort Myers and Naples are very
clean and very new-looking, they are also very dull and very Republican. My favorite
thing about Sarasota is actually its neighboring beach, Siesta Key.
